Day Four- Part Three

When we got back to the hotel, we went straight up to our room to get settled in. I knew our sweet baby girl would be getting hungry by that time, according to the schedule they gave us. I undressed her a little bit (she was wearing A LOT of clothes and was SWEATING so bad!) but didn’t want to undress her all the way to change her because I didn’t want to scare her. Then I changed her diaper and got her some baby food.

While I was getting her food ready, I gave her some toys to play with on the bed. She was very serious, very curious and very quiet, but she was not crying or upset.

She just kept sucking on that spoon and I couldn’t feed her fast enough. She loved it!

After she ate her baby food, I decided to give her a bottle and see if I could get her down for a nap. I took off another layer of her clothes to find very thick, cotton pajamas was the first layer of clothes. I left her in those pj’s. She was very clean- she smelled so good- like she’d just had a bath. And her clothes looked and smelled clean as well, so I wasn’t in a hurry to get her changed.

Jason made her bottle while I changed into some comfy clothes also and then she and I snuggled up in bed for some serious bonding time.

This is the very first picture Jason took of our first bottle together.

She was so precious. She just looked right into my eyes and I just looked right into hers.

It makes me cry when I look back at these pictures. I didn’t cry at the time, which kind of surprised me because I’m usually so emotional and this was a moment that I’d dreamed about for so long. I enjoyed every second and held her and looked into her arms for as long as she’d let me—which was a pretty long time even after she finished her bottle. I was smiling at her and talking softly to her as I held her and she was looking right up at me.

After she finished her bottle, she grabbed this little ball and held on to it for dear life :)

I knew she was really sleepy, so I decided to lay her down on the bed next to me and lay down with her to see if she’d go to sleep this way.

It didn’t take her long before she fell asleep. She also held onto that ball the entire time she was sleeping! I tried to take a nap, but as I laid there next to her my adrenaline was just rushing so much and I was still just so excited that I never could fall asleep, but I did lay in the bed next to her to rest. She took a nice, long 2 hour nap.

When she woke up, we made her another bottle.

I just couldn’t believe how she just looked so sweetly and deeply into my eyes the entire time. I think I had just prepared myself for the worst and that she wouldn’t have a really hard time bonding with me. But we really did start to bond deeply so quickly. The most amazing blessing…

She was really afraid of Daddy and even if he would look at her and talk to her from across the room, she would cry and snuggle up really tight to me. I know it was really hard for him because he just loved her so much and wanted to show her his love and get to know his baby girl, but he is just the best Daddy. He was thankful that she was bonding to Mamma so well and he just tried really hard to step back and stay out of her space so he wouldn’t scare her.

She and I just talked and played all afternoon and evening. I just tried to keep making as much eye contact as possible while we talked and played.

Anytime I would leave the room (which I only did to go to the bathroom!) she would get so very upset. Later in the evening, I really, really needed a shower, but i was hesitant to leave her and upset her. Finally, I decided to just take a quick shower. When I got out, it just about made my heart burst to find this:

She did get really upset, but Daddy picked her up and held her and rocked her while she cried. Eventually, she quit crying and Daddy just stood by the huge window and kept holding and rocking so she would feel better. This was the beginning of their bonding :)

We went to bed as early as we could because Mamma and Daddy were exhausted and we knew we had to get up super early the next morning.

We didn’t get much sleep…. she would only sleep if she was laying on top of me with her hands around or near my neck. She was making sure this new lady didn’t try to leave her :)

But this was perfectly ok with me. I was just happy to have my baby in my arms!! AND that she was already beginning to love her Mamma back… wow… I couldn’t have even imagined how much I would love her so immediately and that our first hours together would be so smooth, comfortable, wonderful and so full of love.

Oh, friends… SHE was worth every single day. Week. Month. Year. that I dreamed about and longed for a baby to love. I would do it ALL over again for HER. No question.

The next day was the day we would make it official!