Eight Months

Yesterday marked 8 months on the waiting list for our little girl. I knew the 9th of the month was Saturday, but I never thought about it all day yesterday. We somehow (miraculously!) ended up without any soccer games on the schedule all weekend. Jason let me sleep in (which he always does if we don't have anywhere to go) while he did the dishes and played with the kids. Then we spent a few hours at one of our local parks. It was just a gorgeous day and we had a great time. Afterwards, we chilled out at home for about an hour and then went to church. We had a wonderful, relaxing day and I'm glad I didn't dwell on what day it was for a change! I've been so anxious since we started our adoption process-- I'm just not good or laid back with unknowns and waiting- never have been. The past couple months imparticular I've been really praying differently and really trying to focus on the positives instead of all the bad "what ifs". God has granted me such a peace and I'm really in a much better "place" than I have been since this roller coaster ride started. I've not really shared about it here on the blog before, but since before Christmas, ET adoptions with our agency have been at a stand still. We just found out Friday that things are moving again! We are praying that some of our sweet friends will be getting referrals soon. (Like THIS week hopefully!) I think it will still be a while before we get ours, but hopefully no later than the next few months...??? A girl can dream, right?! BUT-- I'm more content waiting now than I have been since we got on the waiting list last Summer. I've known all along in my head that God knows the day- the hour even- that we will get to bring her home. Nothing surprises him. He's got this and he works ALL things together for my/her GOOD. Even if I don't understand. FINALLY, that truth has worked it's way down into my heart as well and I can say, "It's all good." Doesn't mean I don't have days where I have a heavy heart and cry... It's not like there aren't emotions. But I'm thankful for those days too because it reminds me that God has been and continues preparing my heart to be her Mamma and it seems like I have the sweetest fellowship with the Lord those days. I'm ready to see her face and move into the next phase and I'll be waiting expectantly, but patiently for that day!